~ kusala
[ ku-sa-la: Pali term meaning wholesome, skillful, good, meritorious. ]
[ Action characterized by this quality (kusala-kamma) is bound to result (eventually) in happiness and a favorable outcome. ]


2006-08-18 - 11:08 a.m.

Erotic Landmines

Definitely had a "Right On!" moment when reading Huntington's latest.

Of course I share his indignation. He and I have talked about this before, and I'm convinced that this has something to do with the dating- and/or sex-bardo that I mentioned to him in a recent email exchange.

I definitely don't want to disclose if I were to have a nonverbal snog with someone in the bushes at the beach (or in a sex club). More often than not, though, guys in those situations aren't usually in the mood to interrogate about sero-status.

The online stuff is much worse. One more example of the impersonality and rudeness that goes along with the cyber-hookup scene. I'm really feeling like my days (and there were many) of that are mostly (but certainly not entirely) over... and I don't mind.

My favorite requirements from the cyber-ads are "disease free" (which I've written about), and references to "clean" (e.g., "must be clean" "clean & drug-free ONLY", etc.).

The "clean" thing, I must admit, REALLY bothers me more and more lately. I feel like screaming (or the instant-chat equivalent): YEAH, I TOOK A F*CKING SHOWER THIS MORNING AND EVEN SCRUBBED BEHIND MY EARS. I COULDN'T BE ANY "CLEANER".

I think what I hate is the euphemism. Just say HIV-negative, g*ddamnit!! It has nothing to do with being "clean." And "disease-free" comes across as just plain rude.

I've been wondering lately whether sex will ever really hold much allure ever again. Sometimes, it's not a bad thing to have the libido of a eunuch; I've often thought about all the free time in the past I've wasted cruising for whatever. I'm not sure if Effexor is totally to blame for my current bout of spinsterhood, or if there's something deeper at work in my psyche.

In any case, I'll have sex when I want to, I guess... and if I don't, I won't.

F*ck, I feel old.

To steal a page from Francis S., the Swedish word of the day is smittad. It means infected.

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